Starting my Mornings with Jesus

I am so blessed to stay at home with this precious angel. 

I was putting clean sheets on the bed in the guest bedroom, and Jackson found himself in the mirror. He was smiling and talking to himself, so I had to grab the camera. 


Before Adam and I got married we talked about how we wanted me to stay home with our children. We knew that we would do whatever it took to make that happen, and I am so glad we did.  Although my days are partially filled with doing things that never end (laundry, dishes etc.) the other parts of my days are spent taking care of the blessing God has thankfully given to us.  


One of my favorite parts of our day is right before his nap. We snuggle and I rock him and pray over him and sing to him, and he sweetly lays his head on my shoulder. I listen to him breathe in and out, and he pats my face as I'm singing to him. I will cherish these moments forever.


Lately God has been stirring my heart to really think about what I want our home life to look like, what my role is as a wife and a homemaker, and how important those two jobs are. The home is so important. I want it to be haven for Adam when he comes home. I want it be security and love and acceptance, a place where our children know that they are loved, and know that they are safe. I want it to be a place of learning and fun, where they can ask hard questions, and get hard answers in love. Where Christ is honored and glorified. 


I know that this doesn't happen overnight, and it doesn't happen without Christ in me, which is why I've been making myself get up early each morning to spend time with Jesus. I've felt convicted for a while now about doing that. Once Jackson was born, I was just so sleep deprived that getting up early was not going to happen. But now that Jackson is consistently sleeping well, the Lord has been whispering to me that it is time, time to start back spending  those precious first few minutes of my day with Him.


I have so much that I want to be praying for, so much that I am anxious for God to do in my heart, and in other's lives. I also have a few things I have felt the Lord nudge me to start doing. I can't wait to see what He does! 

As I watch Jackson crawl and explore, I can't help but feel the weight of the responsibility that Adam and I have.  Jackson NEEDS me to start my day talking with Jesus. Maybe you would disagree, but I know that in order for me to be the mom that God has called me to me, and be the wife that Proverbs 31 speaks of, and in order for my home to be a haven, I must start my day with Jesus.  Do you feel God calling you to spend time with Him? Oh how I pray that you and I both would be diligent to do so.


Blessings,
Monica

A Giving Heart

My husband has the biggest heart of anyone I know. Period.

The other day we were in the car talking about our future, and where we would like to be (God-willing of course:)) Anyway, we were talking about money, and I threw out a relatively high number, and asked him how he would feel if he made that salary. I, of course, was somewhat joking, somewhat serious. And do you know what my precious husband's response was? He got huge smile on his face and said,


 "Gosh Monica. Just think, if I made that much, can you imagine how much we could give away!"


Melt my heart. Honestly, that man would give you the shirt off of his back, if he thought for a millisecond that you needed it. I love him so much, and I am so blessed to walk through this life with him!

I Know that You are for Me..

Did you know that God is for you? That he is on your side, that he is your biggest fan? Sometimes circumstances do not go as planned, or when our prayers seem to go unanswered, we may not vocalize it, but we feel like God is not there, or worse, that God is against us. We think because we didn't do such and such, or because we did such and such, that God is against us. You should know today that God is not against you. God is not your enemy. The bible says that God is for us. Praise Jesus. This means that the creator of the universe, the maker of heaven and earth, the redeemer of souls, the ultimate healer is on your side, shepherding you towards what is best. 

Lately, for whatever reason, I have had to remind myself that Jesus is on my side. That he is not disgruntled with me. He loves me more than I could ever possibly comprehend, and he wants abundant life for me. He is for me. I know that he is for me. I've listened to the following song over and over and over, and over, making the song my prayer, to remind myself that God is FOR ME! Listen to the song, and be blessed:)

Kari Jobe "You are for me"

Mid-week Post...My heart is so full!

I know I've been very disciplined to post every week, but my heart is so full right now, I just have to pour it out! We are mere days away from meeting our sweet boy. 

We went into the doctor's office yesterday and found out that there is some progress going on in my body! (slightly dilated, slightly effaced). Since my due date is Monday, my Doctor wants to check me again on Monday and then, I'll either be admitted for induction Monday night, or sometime during the rest of the week, but no later than Thursday. Honestly, Adam and I were SO excited yesterday. Somehow, hearing a possible date made everything SO real.

I feel in my heart that he is coming soon. My body is giving me signs that it is ready, and yesterday morning I woke up with a feeling in my heart that Jackson was ready, like the Lord was saying, "It's ok for him to come now; he's fine." Adam and I have been so desperately praying for Jackson not to come until he is full term and absolutely ready- not until God was finished forming him. And yesterday when I felt the Lord speak to me, peace absolutely took over. I was able to "let go" if you will, and know that from this point forward, any day would be perfect. 

Honestly, I can't believe 40 weeks have passed. The other day I read through my journal entries from a year ago- and it is unbelievable how obvious it is to me (now) that God was preparing me for this pregnancy. Allow me to be vulnerable for a moment..this entry was from March 30th of last year:

Oh wow. How do I begin to talk about what all I have been through. I keep feeling disappointed, as if what I wanted would have been greater or better than what God wanted. I have learned so much:

• what I believe about God’s sovereignty
• that  I need God all the time, even before the bad happens
• that I can’t plan my future
• that Adam is the greatest husband
• that I’m not on a schedule
• God loves me enough to do what is hard
• that pregnancy is a miracle
• that children are a blessing
• how to pray with faith
• how to deal with fear

God did teach me so much, and everything I learned only contributed to making this pregnancy even more of a blessing! God has stretched my faith in ways during this pregnancy that you wouldn't believe. You might even think I was crazy if I told you! And the amazing thing is at the same time, God has been stretching and growing Adam's faith. We both have been able to believe God for several things during this pregnancy, and we have had the joy of watching God actually do the things we prayed for!

Now that we are days away from meeting our boy, we realize that a new journey is beginning. We have been praying each night that God gets a hold of Jackson's heart, and that Jackson learns to live life  loving God and loving others. If Jackson turns out the slightest bit like his dad, he'll be great:) Anyway, please  be praying for us this next week as we embark upon a journey that is going to change our lives!

Here's a pic of something I painted last night for Jackson's room!

16 weeks... "Desert Song" by Hillsong

A few months ago Adam and I went on a mission to trip to Bosnia. While on the trip, I felt incredibly connected to God. I was able to be completely open and vulnerable with Him about my hurts, and fears and dreams. I think because we were so inundated in God's work, it was easier for me to be honest with God on a more personal level.

One night on the trip, while going to sleep, I was overwhelmed with hurt from losing our first baby. And I literally felt my heart aching with the desire to get pregnant again. In that moment God led me to a song. I listened to that song over and over each night of the trip. The lyrics that resonated with me were, "All of my life, in every season, You are still God. I have a reason to sing. I have a reason to worship".  No matter what, God is still God, and I have a reason to worship Him. The two weeks we were in Bosnia God was very much working on my heart. I prayed that God would give me a new prospective, that God would teach me to trust Him, and wait on His timing. Each night as I fell asleep I prayed, "All of my life, in every season, You are still God. I have a reason to sing. I have a reason to worship."

God heard my prayers and not too much longer after that trip we found out I was pregnant. Needless to say, because of the previous miscarriage I delt with fear for a few weeks. But God taught me how to overcome that fear. And this past Sunday God showed up again in a very real way in my life.

Our church was doing a message on pivotal circumstances, how circumstances both incredibly bad and incredibly good can alter the direction of your life. The truth of the message was that no matter how horrible of a situation you are in, God can still be praised, and there is still hope. The same song that I had listened to a hundred times before was on the schedule, and I happened to be scheduled to sing it. I don't believe in coincidences. The Lord orchestrated everything, and gave me the opportunity to sing that song.

As I stood there singing the line that had spoken to me over and over, I couldn't help but think of how 3 months ago I was clinging to those words telling God I would worship Him no matter what, and now I was singing those exact lyrics while a sweet child was being formed in my womb.  I can't explain how full my heart was in that moment. My God really does care about every detail and facet of my life, and He can be trusted with every detail and facet of my life. His timing is undeniably perfect. In horribly difficult times and in joyful times, "I have a reason to sing. I have a reason to worship"

Today I am 16 weeks pregnant, and I know that each day with this child is a blessing. Each moment God gives Adam and I with this little baby is a blessing, and no matter what happens in my life I know, "You are still God, I have a reason to sing. I have a reason to worship". 

16 week picture:

And so you can see how much I've grown...here is the 9 1/2 week picture: